Funny Friday

A wife got her mother-in-law a cemetery plot for Christmas. It came with a coffin, tomb stone, the works. Next Christmas comes by and the wife gets her nothing. When the mother-in-law asks, "Why didn't you get me a gift?" the wife says, "You haven't used the one I got you last year!"

An elderly couple was attending church services. About halfway through she leans over and says to her husband. "I just let out a silent fart. What do you think I should do?" He replies, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."

A little girl is serving her father tea while her mother is out shopping. The mother comes home and the father says, "Watch this!" The little girl goes and serves the mother tea. The mother responds, "Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?"

Little Susie, a six-year-old, complained, "Mother, I've got a stomach ache." "That's because your stomach is empty," the mother replied. "You would feel better if you had something in it." That afternoon, her father came complaining that he had a severe headache all day. Susie perked up, "That's because it's empty," she said. "You'd feel better if you had something in it."

There is a senior citizen driving on the highway. His wife calls him on his cell phone and in a worried voice says, ''Herman, be careful! I just heard on the radio that there is a madman driving the wrong way on Route 280!'' Herman says, ''I know, but there isn't just one, there are hundreds!''

How To: Chevron Crocheted Blanket

QUICK TIP before starting: Counting is VERY important when crocheting! One number off could offset the whole blanket.

STEP 1: Chain in increments of 50 until desired length. I did 150 chains.
(This prevents having an uneven chevron at the end of your blanket.)

STEP 2: SKIP the stitch closest to your hook.

STEP 3: Single crochet into the next 11 stitches

STEP 4: Next, single crochet 3 times into your 12th stitch.
(This will create the upward point of your chevron.)

STEP 5: Continue a single crochet in the next 11 stitches.
(This will bring you to the end of your first chevron.)

STEP 6: SKIP the next 2 stitches and single crochet into the next 11 stitches.
(This will begin the downward point of your next chevron.)

STEP 7: Next, single crochet 3 times into your 12th stitch.
(This will create the upward point of your chevron.)

STEP 8: Continue a single crochet in the next 11 stitches.
(This will bring you to the end of your second chevron.)

Repeat steps 6-8 until you reach the last two stitches in your chain.

STEP 9: SKIP one and single crochet into the last stitch.

STEP 10: Move to your next row by making one chain and turning your work around.

COLOR CHANGE (I suggest 4-5 rows of each color before switching.)

Before finishing your last single crochet, hook your next color. You will now have 3 loops on your hook.

Finish the single crochet into your last chain and then chain one with new color.



FINISHING

To finish off blanket, knot each color and weave in all the yarn ends to blanket.

Thankful Thursday

I am very thankful for a dear friend of mine. This friend has been there for me alot lately in my good times and bad. It never seems to matter how bad of a day he has, he is always right there to check up on me.

He seems to always know just what to say to make my day go from bad to good. So thank you Chase, for being right there at all hours of the night and day! I couldn't be any happier than to have gotten to know you more these last few months!

Beef Stew: Crock Pot Style

Ingredients:

2 pounds beef stew meat, cut into 1 inch cubes
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 clove garlic, minced
1 teaspoon paprika
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
1 onion, chopped
1 1/2 cups beef broth
3 potatoes, diced
4 carrots, sliced
1 stalk celery, chopped

Place meat in slow cooker.

In a small bowl mix together the flour, salt, and pepper

Pour over meat, and stir to coat meat with flour mixture.

Stir in the garlic, paprika, Worcestershire sauce, onion, beef broth, potatoes, carrots, and celery.

Cover and cook on Low setting for 10 to 12 hours, or on High setting for 4 to 6 hours.